OCTOBER 16, 2019
The Noonday Witch (2016)
Movie #19
Director: Jiri Sadek
Length: 90 minutes
Platform: Shudder
This is a folky horror adjacent tale about a mother (Eliska) and her daughter (Anita?) moving out to the country (in Czech Republic) while dad is away or something. He's totally going to join them, definitely not dead or whatever. Meanwhile the town they come to, a sparsely populated brightly lit wheat field-y type affair, is the dad's hometown. The townsfolk remember him as a fun fellow, bit weird though. Speaking of the townsfolk, we got the mayor and his wife (She's a bit off, strangled her young son years ago in a tragic accident, now just wanders around the town talking about noonday witches, and such), There's Zdenik (big, burly type, helps Eliska get settled, totally comes on to her) and his wife (Dasa?). Various other sweaty overweight folk, not too many, place is sparsely populated and all.
So, this is a bit of a bait and switch to be honest. Not much horror to be found here. The majority of the picture is shot in beautiful, popping off the screen daylight, which is always a challenge in these type of movies. They nearly pull it off but then undercut things a bit by interspersing some nighttime scenes and throwing in a few jump scares, here and there. Anyone can scare with the dark. The scenes I most liked were, of course, the daytime scenes. We hear stories of "the Noonday Witch" throughout. She comes for children. In this case, Anita. As she comes closer, the days get hotter, more oppressive. This is all captured quite beautifully. However, enough with the nighttime stuff, it's not called "The Nighttime Witch". What's with that scene of Zdenik showing up drunk, at Midnight? I guess I'll give the picture a little bit of credit for not having him overtly throw himself at Eliska. He's sad yes, but not a monster. Also, there are no monsters in "The Noonday Witch". Just breaking people.
So, I can't say I really liked this one too much. The score is really good. It's a piano score, "moved me a bit" is what I wrote in my notes over a week ago. The sound effects are good, dripping faucets and clanking pans, etc. The look of the picture is also lovely. Miles of fields, a tiny old town, a little old farmhouse on the outskirts. All of this is lovely to look at and listen to. None of it's really unsettling or particularly involving, however. It's in subtitles so be sure to lock your phone away. It's fine (which is pretty much the worse thing you can say, apologies).
OCTOBER 18, 2019
Demons 2 (1986)
Movie #20
Director: Lamberto Bava
Length: 91 minutes
Platform: Shudder
Now "Demons 2" is a movie. Set in a high rise building, it seems to take place at the same time as the event of "Demons 1", or perhaps it's taking place in an entirely different timeline. Anyway, "Demons 2" is the story of a bunch of people (kids, partygoers, nerds, gym rats, etc) who live in a high rise and are attacked by demons after they come out of the movie they're watching on the television. So, we got a movie within a movie since, at one point, we're with the characters in the movie on the tv and I forget that we're not watching the events set in the movie that's not the movie within the movie but the movie WE'RE actually watching. Make sense? Ok, so the demons escape from the tv and start infecting the shit out of everybody.
Characters-wise, we got a young girl (Asia Argento, way before she became problematic), we got a young boy (the sling-shot type), we got a nerdy couple (he's studying for a physics exam, she already passed it "while three months pregnant" she likes to point out), we got a big party for Sally (with some terrific era appropriate music -- The Smiths, Dead Can Dance, Peter Murphy, etc), a bunch of meatheads in the basement gym, a john and his prostitute ("mind if we do it with the tv on?"). In a possible, but doubtful, throwback to "The Lift" we even got an elevator that factors into this thing, not really a character though.
Is it good? It's certainly fun in an "Evil Dead 2" sort of way. It's almost exactly on that wavelength. The demons scratch a victim. They almost immediately turn and then look to scratch somebody else. The transformation involves pulsating veins which is pretty fucking gross. I'm not a vein guy. Also, it involves your teeth falling out and being replaced by demon teeth (think, rodent teeth). I'm not really a "falling out" teeth guy either.
So, we've got a cross here between "Evil Dead 2" and "Aliens". These demons also have acid for blood. There's a wonderful moment involving a demon's blood spilling on to the penthouse floor and making its way down into the ducts where it ruins plumbing, air conditioning, dogs, etc. The coup de grace of this picture is the stuff involving the gym rats, trapped in the underground parking garage, fighting back. It becomes a veritable demolition derby down there. One of the guys becomes like Sgt. Apone, barks out orders, kicks some ass, dies horribly. Lamberto Bava is the son of Mario Bava and you can just tell this shit is in his genetics. This picture features a death by tanning booth and a birthing scene scored to some wildly inappropriate music. Also, look out for the tiger "roar" sound effect. They use it repeatedly. It's hilarious and makes for a neat drinking game.
Passion of a Darkly Noon (1996)
Movie #21
Director: Philip Ridley
Length: 101 minutes
Platform: Shudder
"Passion of a Darkly Noon" is the story of a suited up Brendan Frasier running through a forest for some reason, fleeing something or whatever. Eventually, he passes out in the middle of the road and is picked up by some 90s looking mothercucker, I think Loren Dean, who can remember...all the same. He's brought to a remote farmhouse in the back of Dean's pickup where he gives us his best Jesus Christ pose. I think I saw Viggo Mortensen's name on the credits. Ashley Judd lives in the farmhouse. She undresses Frasier and puts him to bed. Next day, he wakes up, finds Judd napping on the porch. She wakes up, explains how her husband Clay is a carpenter, makes coffins. Oh, and Frasier was naked, threw on a trench coach. Back to Clay, he's a carpenter, makes coffins, goes for "long walks in the dark". I turned it off. Never did see Vigo. Judd looked great though.
Movie #21 (for real, this time)
Director: Larry Fessenden
Length: 91 minutes
Platform: Amazon Prime
I wasted twenty minutes on that sub-David Lynch bullshit "Noon Darkly". Here's something I saw on Amazon Prime for free. I like Wendigos. It's got Patricia Clarkson. She's always good. Jake Weber was decent in the "Dawn of the Dead" remake. Larry Fessenden is an interesting indie filmmaker, does a lot to support up-an-coming horror directors (he appears in "Darling" and I think one other movie from this month). So, "Wendigo" is the story of a family (Weber-Clarkson-boy) driving into upstate New York to get away from the big city of a while. Weber, ape-ing many Dustin Hoffman performances, is incapable of relaxing. See, he's from the city and is like totally neurotic. On the way up north, they hit a buck. Some hunters immediately approach, chastise him for hitting the buck they shot, cracking its antler. One guy, Otis, seems particularly upset must be one of those hating on city folk types, says he's going to piss in the reservoir every day from now on (the reservoir provides the drinking water for the city). Weber (name's Miles) being the bundle of anxiety that he is, does not let this go. Anyway, great start to the trip.
Like "The Noonday Witch" this is more a picture about various human frailties and the things they can drive us to do. Unlike "The Noonday Witch" I'm pretty sure there's some supernatural shit at work here as well. See, the boy picks up a little Wendigo figure at the pharmacy in town. He was given it by the Native American clerk behind the counter. Turns out, there was no Native American clerk behind the counter. Spooky shit.
Essentially, what we got here is a morality tale. Some real "Tales from the Crypt" type bullshit. You see, that hunter Otis? Not only does he hate outsiders. He also hates outsiders that rent the house he grew up in (They long ago lost it to the bank, now he lives in a trailer). So, lotta strikes against the Weber-Clarkson-boy clan. They antagonized a hunter by damaging the antler of a buck he shot, firstly. That antagonized hunter is, in fact, a hunter, so we can infer he's got guns. His name is Otis. Guys named Otis are historically a problem, I'm pretty sure. And he's a big drinker, inferred from his living in a trailer, being a hunter, and being named Otis. All this culminates in the most tragic sledding accident this side of "Ethan Frome".
I liked this movie but I got a bit of problem with it. Why not put more work into the actual Wendigo shit? Instead they do the whole jittery camera "wait am I actually seeing what I think I'm seeing" type of deal, which is fine. Also, whose side is the Wendigo on? It seems like he causes tragedy simply so he could avenge said tragedy? Or, was the tragedy preordained? Did he not have a responsibility to help avert it? I don't know, this one was pretty good I guess. Oh, and snow...lots and lots of snow, you probably inferred that by the sledding reference.
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